Dear....

It's a quarter after one A.M. and I should be sleeping. I have a 5k run in t-minus 7 hours but my eyes can't seem to stay shut and words are filling my brain. You ever do that? Lay in bed and think of what you are going to write and then you start creating sentences and think, "Man, that would be such a good blog." I do that all the time but this time I'm writing them down.

My mind is a little foggy and I actually feel sad at the moment. I just watched, "Dear John" and my eyes were never dry during the entire movie. Is it possible to feel that way towards another person to the point where you miss someone so much that it hurts? Love someone so much that you would write them letters for an entire year? Tell them all about your life through love letters? And after everything, expect them to wait for you?

I couldn't believe she married Tim, after she was so in love with John. Can loneliness get the best of you and make you do crazy things? I don't know if they ended up getting back together, but they were so crazy in love...I wanted them to be together. Call me a hopeless romantic--just seeing John's anticipation for her letters---and then the last letter where she broke up with him, I could feel his pain. Call me a baby, I don't care! I am sensitive and empathetic! I am a Cancer, what can I say? I cry when I'm happy-mad-sad-joyful... anything. I even cry when I see a cute puppy on television.

But Love? That's a whole other story. I haven't been in love for... years. I slightly remember the feeling of being on cloud 9 and everything was amazing. Time never mattered as long as I was in his presence and we were laughing, touching and kissing. Nothing annoyed me and those flaws were the things that I loved about him. The butterflies when I saw his name on my phone or when I saw him walk into a room. It felt like heaven with chocolate everywhere. But love can be blind. And after he broke my heart, I never felt that way since.

So there you have it. And to my future love... Here's my letter to you.

Dear Future Love,

I'm the woman who will love you forever. I'm simple and I don't like extravagant things. Surprise me any chance you get because keeping me on my toes will always make me smile. I'll cook for you and bake your favorite dessert. I'll walk around in sweats and a tee shirt because I'm comfortable. I will travel the world with you because I want to share adventures and create adventures together. I will stay up all night talking to you because I want to know everything about you. I will laugh at my own jokes so get used to it. I love to have company over and be the best hostess. I will take pictures of you because I can. I'll drink an ICEE with you on a cold day because we're crazy. There's so much more I could tell you, but just know that my love is true.

I can't wait to meet you.

Until Then.